1. This will be one of my most depressing blog posts (God willing).
2. After checking on-line for my grad school admission status for the 100th time in the last few weeks I saw this notification...
3. "We regret to inform you that you have been denied admission to Cal State Fullerton." it goes onto say, "The department no longer has space available. Please check with the department for future availability."
4. Before I go on, I just want to say this really is not a "Woe is me, please remind me what a terrific person I am" post.
5. Rather this is a "I am heart broken and I now have no clue what to do with my life" post...it's a cathartic venting exercise where I will be too blunt about how much this sucks.
6. I had goals...get a Master's degree in Sociology and teach at the Community College level...I can't begin to wrap my head around the fact that it's not going to happen now.
7. I have to admit this totally overshadows graduation...since I'm only walking in the small Women's Studies ceremony I'm worried they'll want to announce what we'll be doing after graduation...I don't think, "I have no freaking clue" is going to cut it.
8. I have to go to school tomorrow...I have to write papers still...I feel like there is no point.
9. I am ashamed of myself. I know I probably shouldn't be, but I am.
10. Okay that's enough negativity. I am lucky to have an amazing support system...you would of thought I told Sean he didn't get into grad school for how upset he was. My mom seamlessly combined mothering and therapy. And Mac was my favorite, he was in total problem solving mode. He made sure that I called to double check, asked if there was anything Grandma could do to help me get in and then reassured me that I have my "card making business"
I know this is totally one of those it happened for a reason, something good will come from it events...it's just to take awhile until I feel that way.
