That's what the head social worker at the adoption agency just said to us about two dozen times in a fifteen minute meeting.
We went into their office this afternoon to discuss getting started again with the adoption process only to learn that they have no intention of placing any baby with us until much time has passed. As she said, "They as an agency are so raw that she can only imagine how raw we're feeling."
Actually we were feeling pretty hopeful, granted a little reserved and hesitant, but we were committed to being the best family we could be and willing to take the risks again.
Sean tried to get her to give us some kind of time frame...she finally said, "months and months and months". She said it wasn't that they didn't trust us as parents, and that we were a very "cute couple", but they absolutely wouldn't work with us at this point. The exchange was very reserved and pretty much altogether cold. She did offer their blessing if we wanted to look into other agencies.
There was nothing else to say, we were dumbfounded to say the least. It felt as if they didn't trust us at all and that we were up against a wall. It hasn't been the first time I've felt this way during the whole debacle, therefore I'm grateful to know this now so that we can decide what to do and where to move on to.
So, now we really are back at the beginning...and it feels even worse...
