Just Make Stuff

Good stuff...

...it's one of those precious few days in Southern California where everything is especially clean and bright...it rained last night so this afternoon has been filled with blue sky and puffy clouds...my neighbors trees have started sprouting my favorite spring green leaves...it's amazing how it happens overnight

...I think the house might actually be clean...I spent some time this morning re-organizing Mac's closet...it's like I want to hold my breath and not move, for surely something will be a mess again all too soon

...still scrapbooking a lot...my book is now all caught up too...for the first time in just about forever

...even though this baby waiting has been slightly torturous, living under the gun and never knowing if the next time the phone rings it'll really be IT has done wonders for my productivity...but I still kind of really super want to have our baby

...we officially need to go back to the jewelry store...weeks ago it occured to me that we should get Roxana a necklace with Darby's birthstone...after last week's hospital trip I went out the next day and bought an amethyst necklace and ordered a matching one for Darby...all the while double checking that they could be exchanged in case we went into the next month...since March 1st is tomorrow I need to go make an exchange for an aquamarine necklace tonight after dinner

...so I'll see you back here tomorrow...I'm trying hard to make sure I post everyday for those of you who are kind enough to be anxious on Baby Watch with us...thanks for hanging in there with me :)

Off to meet a friend for dinner at Souplantation...

Okay, 3rd time has GOT to be the charm...

Guess where I went this morning?  After taking the world's fastest shower and driving like a maniac?

the hospital

Guess where we got sent home from...AGAIN...with false labor?

the hospital

Poor Roxana...she's SO very done.  The exam today had her in so much pain that she was crying...I had the HARDEST time with that...I would give anything to labor for her...I can't stand the thought that she has to go through this. 

I keep telling her the third time has GOT be the charm.  The kind midwives eagerly assured her that this happens to so many women and that she wouldn't be pregnant forever.

Anyways...she's still 60% effaced and now she's 1.5 cm dilated. 

Baby Watch continues...

One last weekend...

This will most likely be the last weekend with just us.  Sean and I only have Mac every other weekend, so for the last eight years we've had the chance to be parents, but also get lots of "us" time. 

This has been the quintessential "us" weekend.  Me scrapbooking with music blasting, cleaning the house, running errands, eating lunch out yesterday, watching TV snuggled on the couch with the fireplace on, sleeping in...altogether relaxing.  Yet, all the while it's tucked in the back in my head, this is the LAST time...for a loooong time. 

Still on my get-stuff-done kick.  Yesterday, among various errands, we bought the birthday gifts we need for friends and family in April and I got both Mac and Darby's Easter baskets done.  More organizing around the house...including Miss Darby's accessory drawer.  Crazy, much? :)

The other fun and excitement around here was we went out to see Mac's first baseball game yesterday.  Bad mom that I am, I never remember to sign him up for baseball season...the sign-ups are in November or something and it never occurs to me.  This year Bryce's sister signed him up for a Challenger league in her neighborhood since her two step-kids have been on little league teams.  So we met them out there yesterday morning for his first game...he was soooo freaking cute in his Indians uniform.  Challenger games are set up with two innings...everyone bats till they hit the ball and then runs all the bases.  Mac decided to practice his "slide" which consisted of him falling to his knees as he approached each base.  Sean got this photo of him sliding into home. 

As far as Baby Watch, Roxana decided she was too tired to go out on Friday night.  Her contractions have still been far apart, but she reported that the baby felt a lot "lower" when she walked around.  Her next appointment is Thursday, but I'll give her a call tomorrow to see how she's doing and if she needs anything.

I think...

there's a chance that, if we don't have a baby this weekend and I keep up my current level of productivity, that I might run out of things to do.  Oh, the horror! :)

Sean stacked all the birth announcements like this as he finished up the covers...meanwhile I addressed all the envelopes...it feels SO good to know that we got as much as we could done with these.  Also that, simple as they may be, they're homemade.  With the introduction of Miss Darby there will be the swift exit of the time we've had to undertake these kinds of projects...so one last  massive, homemade, assembly-line undertaking for a few years. 

Sean coined the term, "Baby Watch 2006" to describe of our life at this point, when we we talking to my dad last night....the local news stations always have their "Storm Watch" to hype up the latest chance of Southern California getting .001 of an inch of rain. 

My dad was in town briefly on his way home to Oklahoma from a trip to the Philippines.  He told me he had something for me from a "fun day" he had on his trip.  I have to admit I feared what it could be since "fun" as far is he's concerned usually involves something like a knee arthroscopy or some crazy outdoor venture...like pigs or broom corn (don't ask).  Last night he handed me a little box that held a pair of sea water pearl earrings he had made for me and a little pair for Darby.  He proudly told me he brought back pearl earrings for all his girls.  Since he has all daughters, and a step-daughter, and a wife and a soon-to-be grand-daughter he had a lot of earrings to buy. :)   I've got to say though, his enthusiasm was the best gift.

So "Baby Watch" continues...Sean and I have plans to take Roxana out again tonight...dinner and movie or whatever else she wants to do...going into labor would be fun...

Endlessly ready...

Working on the birth announcements while we wait.  I ordered a little "Griffin Family" address stamp with all family members accounted for. :) The diaper bag, camera, and formula (just in case there's a problem at the hospital) are waiting by the door. 

Other than that just having a little family drama to keep life interesting...my mom was pretty taken aback by our plans for a "family" baby shower when I called her last night about the guest list.  She's not sure if her/our family friends would want to come to a "young couples" shower.  Then, out of the blue, my sister calls this morning...haven't really talked to her in a year beyond birthday and Christmas phone call formalities.  She just wanted to congratulate us on the baby and ask a few questions (for example, "So, uh, what kind of baby is this?").  She told me she'd be happy to sit down with me at some point and talk things out.  Dumbfounded, I managed to answer, "Thanks for offering, but I don't really know what there is to talk about".  Well, you can only imagine how well that went over.  I was met with, "Okay, well goodbye."  Not quite sure if I could have answered her any better...I guess I could have tried, "No chance in hell I want to talk to you for a minute more than I have to" or "Actually I've had enough drama, lying, back-stabbing and criticism, thanks though."  Oh well, what can you do?

I will just keep getting endlessly ready...

But we were sent home...

So, I settled into bed last night around 11:30pm and the phone rang.  It was the shelter, Roxana's contractions had been five minutes apart for over an hour.  After double checking that we had the packed diaper bag and the camera and the camera and the diaper bag... we were off to take her to the hospital. 

Turns out it was a false alarm...still just dilated to 1cm.  We were sent home at about 1:30am.  It was a good practice run though...might take the edge off.  Did you know my teeth chatter uncontrollably when I think I'm taking a birth-mom to the hospital to have our baby?  Neither did I...

Oh no, I'm not having ANY fun...

This baby girl stuff, man, it's killing me.  So much cutey-cute stuff.  I just have to share some of my favorite recent finds...

I got the tip to head to a store called Bergstroms from the employees at my local scrapbook store Scrapbook Oasis...and when I walked in there I found this stuff...Zutano... all the colors and patterns are way too much fun...and they're so soft too...and they have matching hats...can you tell I love this stuff? :)

Then I found these socks on-line tonight...I'm behaving and not getting them...yet...but come on, little Mary Jane socks...does it get any cuter?

Finally (for now) there is this store...Janie & Jack...I found it last year when I was getting gifts for friends...definitely a wait-till-it's-on-sale store...their gift wrapping is the cutest thing ever...Sean and I did pick up some of their Fall stuff on sale a couple weeks ago...it made me SO happy to walk into the store to shop for our child

Could be today...

"It could be today..." is what the midwife said at Roxana's appointment a couple of hours ago.  She went on to say, "or it could be three more weeks". 

What we know for sure is that she is 60% effaced and 1 centimeter dilated.

When I was pregnant with Mac I was in the hospital for my last couple of weeks.  With all the complications we were having I literally woke up every morning not knowing if I was going to have a baby that day. 

It's taken me almost 10 years to realize that that is actually how it works in every pregnancy, you get to a certain point and then it could happen any day.  I guess it could be today, or tomorrow, or March 11th even.  I'm going to be waking up every morning not knowing if my baby will be born later that day.

In case it's today or tomorrow...I'd better go get some more stuff done around here. :)

Beary Happy...

On Wednesday, sitting eating fast food after a doctor's appointment, Roxana and I randomly ended up in a brief discussion about stuffed animals and I asked if if she'd ever been to Build-a-Bear.  When she said no, I knew we should make a trip there...so we did tonight.

It's the ultimate experience for Mac so he dove right in picking out his bright-green, shamrock-printed bear.  Meanwhile Roxana quietly picked out a lavender colored bear since, as we also talked about on Wednesday, it is one of her favorite colors.  They stuffed them, gave them an "air bath", picked out clothes, and typed up birth certificates. 

After she finished her bear I tentatively asked her if she'd want to make one for the baby.  The look on her face said it all and she went right over to pick out this bear.  When it came time to dress her, Roxana looked around at the outfits for a minute and then asked me what I thought about her dressing it the same as she had dressed hers.  My heart was a puddle on the floor as I told her I was thinking the exact same thing. She named the bear "DJ" and signed the birth certificate from "Roxy". 

It was so fun to have more time together tonight.  To see her personality and sense of humor shine through.  To hear her discuss sports with Sean, and insist that he feel her stomach when she was having an intermittent contraction.  To see Mac show her that she HAD to "clean" her new bear in the Build-a-Bear bathtub.  To discuss the problems she's having with the teacher for the shelter who is frustrated with Roxana since she apparently gets her school work done, "too quickly".

Granted the whole goal in this is to be a family of four, but tonight we already were.  We're not just getting a baby out of this whole deal, we have been given a gracious, amazing young woman who I can say unabashedly that I LOVE.  There will not be another day in my life that I don't think of her, and hope for her, and pray that she will be happy.  I will be so proud to introduce my daughter to her one day, and have her grow up understanding that she came from such an astounding person.

Silly as it may be, I love that we have this tangible teddy bear for Darby to enjoy one day.

A little love...

A simple Valentine's Day around here.  "Mac" got me a few daisies within a minute of Sean pulling in the driveway this afternoon...he claims he found them in the backyard...he IS good, he knows I love flowers, but would prefer a couple inexpensive stems over an elaborate bouquet.

Sean and I have a tradition of making something for each other for Valentine's Day.  After eight years it's getting a little tricky to come up with ideas.  This year made me a magazine holder and I made him a frame that said "Darby & Dad"...couldn't resist that. :)

I also went running around this morning to put together a little Valentine's surprise for Roxanna...some Old Navy pajamas and Jaqua Lotions (at Bath & Body Works...seriously smell so delicious you'll just about want to get out a spoon and eat them).  We just wanted to let her know that even though she's away from home right now, she's loved here too.  I'm taking her for a doctor's appointment tomorrow morning and I plan on grilling her about her likes and dislikes as we're waiting to be seen.  I have purchased three gifts for her so far in the last few weeks and each time I am flying completely blind.  This is a girl I plan on spoiling for just about FOREVER so I need to be in the know. :)

The only other Valentine's excitement is the heart-shaped pancakes will be having for dinner when Sean and Mac get back from therapy in a few minutes.

Happy Valentine's Day

It WILL get done...

"Simplify" and "Get it Done" are my mantra's right about now. 

Baby stuff is done...clothes are washed, everything is put together, what we need right now is purchased, and what we'll need later is registered.

Sean's painting one last little area of the house...seriously the last one...I promise....at least for awhile. :)

Yesterday and today have been all about scrapbooking...eleven layouts for Mac's book are done.  Nothing earth-shattering, just simple, get-the memories recorded scrapping...it still feels good.  This was the one layout I had a little fun with...Sean snapped this of Bryce and I with Mac when we dropped him off on Christmas Eve.  Bryce is pretty good about entertaining me with getting a couple quick photos here and there.

It's weird to think for the last 10 years it's been "Mom and Dad" and "Mom and Seany"...now there will be a new "Mom and Dad" duo too...I can see that getting a little confusing.

Tonight I'm going to keep half-watching the Olympics, get one more layout done, and clean off my desk.  Tomorrow I'll finally get to scrapping this past Christmas...that way the photos won't be waiting around until sometime in April 2009.  After that scrapping is going to be simplified around here...haven't decided how exactly, but I need to set it up so that memories get recorded, I get to play when I get a chance, but I don't end up with an endless to-do list of layouts like I've had in the past.

It WILL get done :)

Warning! Expletives ahead...

"This is bullshit"...that's what I had to say about the inconsistent maneuvers that have to take place in order to get the new baby carrier car seat contraption onto the bare-bone, hopefully simple, stroller frame we purchased to use when I'm picking up Mac everyday from school. 

I couldn't do it, Sean could do it, and then he couldn't, but then we both could do it, and then we tried again and we couldn't.  Therefore I proclaimed the bullshit that it was and went stomping into the house. 

So, we're off to a good start.

Raging PMS and pre-baby preparation don't seem to go together very well.

Last night at Babies'R'Us I think I managed to say "Are you fucking kidding me?" easily a dozen times and that was just before the bassinet versus starts-off-in-the-crib debate was over...it actually isn't a debate as so much it is a quandary...and it's SO not over.

I'm a little overwhelmed at this point (ha ha, yeah just a little)...Sean meanwhile is hanging in there, trooper that he can be.

Rumor has it that once upon a time I HAD a baby...yet you'd never know it at this point.  I am all about the deer-in-highlights look lately.  I think I need to just get her home from the hospital, change my first diaper or something, and just calm the fuck down.  It's like riding a bike, right?  Problem is the first time around my little bike didn't come home from the hospital until he was seven weeks old.   

Funny, when Roxanna asked me about my weaknesses as a parent at our very first meeting a few weeks ago I mentioned cussing way too much.  She looked surprised and said I didn't look like I would be the type to do that, but Sean was there to reassure her, "Oh yeah, she cusses like a sailor."

Today's the day...

I have to admit I'm feeling a little melancholy this morning.  At five o'clock today Sean and I were supposed to take off for Ireland.  We have most of the stuff we needed for the trip...good duffel bags, outlet adapters, travel clocks and pillows, and so on.  Granted I said all along what a great problem it would be if we didn't go to Ireland because we were adopting a baby, but it's still a little hard since it's a major dream of mine that's slipping away for a long time. 

In the last few days I have discovered we can't travel with the baby since she won't have a permanent copy of a birth certificate for well over a year, we don't really have someone to watch her and regardless it would be so hard to leave her behind, and then the kicker is if we transferred the tickets to a different date we'd also have to pay for the current fare changes...for instance, summer time=peak time=highest ticket prices.  Well, if we could afford those easily we would have already gone to Ireland by now...we found an amazing deal on these tickets that's why we were going. 

You know now Darby Jane is never going to be born this week as we stay home, but you also KNOW that if we did board that plane today Roxanna would go into labor and we'd have to come right back, all the while risking not being here in time for our daughter to be born.  That's just the way life seems to work, huh? :)

I'm working with the airline, begging for a refund...I've worked my way through three supervisors at this point and will here from another one early next week, as of now we have a hold on the tickets through November 4, 2006.  If it doesn't work will just chalk it up in our minds as one of our adoption expenses.  In the meantime I'll periodically gaze at the pink closet and the ultrasound photos hanging on the fridge.

Motherhood means sacrifices, right?  Ireland will always be there...

and one day so will I. :)

My new favorite place...

in our house is this screaming pink closet...had a little bit of WAY too much fun getting this all organized. :)

Clothes are all organized by size and dividers tied with ribbon, paperwork is all organized, toys, bath stuff...all organized and just altogether girly and cute.

I've made 60 pink thank you notes since friends are already getting us gifts...I am one lucky girl to have such great friends.

I took Roxanna (birth mom) for a doctor's appointment this morning.  The ultrasound came back as normal, the official due date is March 8th, and our little Darby Jane is already weighing in at 2800 grams...after Google-ing a metric conversion table I was able to discover that equals approximately 6.2 pounds.

Our daughter's name will be...

Finished this up last night...it's hanging on the wall by her crib.  Picked up the idea for "Darby" last spring...randomly enough it was the cute Irish name of the overnight labor and delivery nurse for my friend Laura last May. The middle name is "Jane" which is my mom's name...I really like how they go together.

Still working on the pink closet...it's needing a trip to Target in a little bit...

Paint...

So I get these ideas from time to time...crazy ideas is what they're usually called...as of late it usually involves Sean armed with a can of paint...and this time is no exception.

Granted the colors in the photo in no way truly reflect the pink in it's pepto-bismol hued glory, but here is the latest craziness. 

Since we have a gender neutral room and a bunch of pink clothes, it occurred to me that the closet HAD to be painted pink...just for fun...it's hidden behind denim curtains so you won't see it until you open it...and then the heavens will sing with the joy that is a perfectly organized closet filled with baby girl happiness. :)  Best part is that he will have the whole thing tonight so I can start playing tomorrow!  What would I ever do without Sean? 

In other paint news...I have actually been painting tonight also.  After MUCH thought and ridiculously deep analysis, we officially named this daughter of ours on Saturday afternoon.  I am painting letters to spell out her name over the crib.  Hopefully this project can be wrapped up tonight too so I can take a photo to make the official blog announcement...for those who know the names in the running I carefully photographed two of the letters that would have been in either names. 

Can you tell I'm happy, still so freaking happy?  Do me a favor and please remind me of this elation when I'm sleep deprived and covered in spit-up sometime soon? :)

I have a habit...

I realized this when Mac was on stage last night for the third time in the show.  I cry every time he is up on stage...seriously tears falling down my cheeks, total dorky mom crying.  Can't help it...too proud of him and my heart just swells when I see the ear to ear smile on his face...he LOVES it up there on stage.

He had four performances of the musical Good News this weekend. (He's wearing his fly costume in the photo) Sean and I caught the last one.  It's been such a surreal experience having him be at rehearsals and performances all this week.  Way back in the day Mac's dad and I met in Mrs. Seeley's drama class in high school.  We worked on all the various plays and musicals together whether it was cast or crew.  So to see Mac be a part of musical theater is extra special.

The other amazing thing was the show was GOOD.  To be honest, besides seeing Mac perform I wasn't really looking forward to it.  However, the place he's been attending classes puts on a very impressive show.  I didn't realize teenagers made up half the cast and they were excellent, beautiful voices, great comic timing, and some cool choreography.  I sat there dreaming that one day that would be Mac in one of the lead roles.  We will see, but so far it seems as if we've really found a niche for him.  So hopefully there will be many more shows for me to cry my way though.

Any guesses?????

It's a Girl!!!!!

She's officially 34 weeks and the radiologist will look everything else over and send a report.  I have cried easily ten times in the last couple of hours.  I have dreamed of this like you would not believe.  I will have a daughter.  Tonight I bought clothes (a whole bunch of them) for my daughter. 

MY daughter...I have a son and a daughter...could I be any luckier?

Sick day...

No not mine.

Funny where a day can go...I was posting this morning about having to get stuff done and little did I know what was in store.

First Mac was sent home from school for the second day in a row for being sick.  99 degree fever and a cough.  Yesterday Sean had to pick him up and for the rest of the day he was fine.  This morning he figured he'd try a repeat performance and he landed himself in bed for the day.  No TV, no coloring, no nothing.  If he was too sick to go to school then he just HAD to rest.  I think he's cured now. :)

Then I had to take our birth mom to the hospital since she really has been so very sick with the flu.  She needed to be hydrated since she couldn't keep anything down with her horribly relentless cough.  She's doing better now, but oh, that poor girl...she has really been put through it, as if being pregnant isn't hard enough.  It ended up being a opportunity to spend time together and can I just say again she's the sweetest thing ever.  I just LOVE her...such a good kid.  Sean and I got her all stocked up with medicine and food that's easy on her stomach before we dropped her back off at the home.  I was so relieved to see her feeling better and I'm holding my breath that she continues to improve.  We'll see her for the ultrasound tomorrow...she said Mac could come too.  18 hours and counting...

My mind is a whirlwind...

Between hosting the baby shower, and the trip to Vegas to see all the new scrapbooking fun and excitement (this was my VERY favorite...American Crafts...I could just about eat it I love it so much!)...and then the 1,000,000 baby thoughts...baby names...traveling to Ireland this summer...what we need when we get him/her home from the hospital...what it's going to be like...what we can do to spoil our birth mom...

My brain is warp-speed ahead...random thoughts flying everywhere.

Vegas was so much fun...a perfect trip.  Karen was so great to travel with and was so very tolerant of my state of mind.  We had great talks, great food and saw tons of new products I can't wait to get my hands on.  I also was lucky enough to spend some time with Monica and meet and see lots of other fun people.

Now I'm home and have to get organized.  Sean is apparently nesting.  He called me this morning and had already made phone calls and gotten half a dozen various things done.  Granted he's the hardest working guy around, but taking initive and getting things done isn't always his forte.  He made my morning from hearing that he was already calling to find out how much time he can take off and what we need to do about health insurance for the baby.

"the baby"

Our baby...still pretty crazy goofy happy over the fact I get to say that.

Oh, and ultrasound...tomorrow...4:30pm...as in 29 hours from now I get to see our baby...the wait is KILLING me! :)