Just Make Stuff

So very blessed...

These last 36 hours have been some of the happiest in my life...all the phone calls...and hugs...all the e-mails and posts here...four offers for a baby shower...tears...not just ours...hearing people's joy come through their voices and it's for our family...we are so freaking, unbelievably blessed. 

Thank you, each one of you, for every single kind word here...please know it's meant so much to me.

I'm sitting in bed, half a suitcase packed for tomorrow's trip to Vegas, downstairs is ready for tomorrow's baby shower, we have well over a hundred tea sandwiches to assemble and a couple dozen balloons to blow up in the morning, but that's about it. :)

As for Ireland...called the airline...our tickets are good for a year...we're looking into traveling this summer...together...as a family of four...what's crazier than taking a trip to Ireland just because?  Going with two kids. :)

We had lunch...

She's the cutest thing ever, very quiet, and had great questions for us.  We finished up, she and the woman from the group home left, we were paying and walking out with the social worker from our agency.  The woman from the group home came back in the restaurant looking for us.

She said "Yes"

I ran out to the car and hugged her and cried.

We're having a baby. :)

We're trying to get an ultrasound scheduled...my mom's currently trying to pull strings with friends.

Anyone want two tickets to Ireland? :)

Are you sitting down?

Are you freaking sitting down?

Sean just asked me if we should call his parents and tell them...I said sure and then he said, "No, let's wait...no point in having them have to experience the emotional roller-coaster with us.  I'll call them when we know more" 

However I'm all for camaraderie, so I'm inviting you to all strap yourself into a seat and enjoy the ride with me....

We are meeting a birth-mom tomorrow.

Tomorrow.   

Here's the story.

It's time to leave to pick up Mac this afternoon, I'm tying my tennis shoes and the phone rings.  It's the social-worker from the adoption agency.  She has a birth-mom who has asked to meet us.  Young girl, 17, another rape situation (I asked how common this is and the social worker told me the YEARS she's being doing this she's had two cases ever...both in the last week.).  I want to tell you all the complete details that I know and I started to type it, but realized the whole internet thing...I just don't want to put it out there for any and everyone to read out of privacy for the birth-mom.

I will say this, from what I have heard about her she sounds like an amazing, innocent, hard-working girl who ended up in such an unfortunate situation, she sounds like she comes from a truly supportive mother.  She is approximately 32 weeks along, they'll be doing an ultrasound soon to date the pregnancy.  She takes medication that causes her to skip periods so she just discovered she was in fact pregnant a couple weeks ago...however she has seen a doctor and seems to be doing fine.

I am so excited to meet her and altogether out of my mind nervous.  She saw the information for a bunch of families yesterday and called back today to say she wants to meet us.  US. 

I feel good...hopeful...very eerie meant to be at this point...but we are in definite need of prayers, and thoughts, and just EVERYTHING you got for us.  Thanks :)

I'm going crazy...

Phew...time is flying...I'm a to-do list maniac.  Granted have I written one damn thing down?  No...that'd be too easy...instead I just endlessly ramble a monologue through my head of "oh got to do this, got to buy that, got to call them...".  Just the general craziness that is life when you're hosting a friend's baby shower on Sunday, leaving for CHA in Vegas literally the hour the shower is finished, coming home to a son who has rehearsals and musical performances all week and weekend and then leaving for Ireland the next week. 

My mind is filled with thoughts of tea sandwiches and international power adapters.  I'm making calls to order a cake and to rent a GSM cell phone which apparently is what works over there and it costs a small fortune. 

I have been a travel accoutrement buying maniac...finding pillows, clocks, bags and other clever items at The Container Store, Brookstone, and even REI.  My inner traveler has certainly come out and after this trip I think I'll be prepared to travel the world. :)

As requested...

I've been in a bit of a funk for the rest of the day...although we had a great evening having breakfast for dinner, watching TIVOed Dancing with the Stars from last night, and hanging out on the pile of blankets Mac put in front of the fire...a very thankful-for-my-blessings kind of a night.

Now I've been getting a bunch of photos ready for an Ali Edwards class I'm looking forward to taking tomorrow.  Nothing like waiting till the very last minute to organize and print out the forty cropped photos I need.

I got a couple requests for close-up looks at the framed scrapbook paper and jewelry holders so I took a couple more photos this morning as I was getting some shots around the house for the class.  Hope this helps give a little better look at my crazy decorating ideas. :)

So, I'm sitting here procrastinating about exercise...

it's half way through the day and I haven't done much more than straighten-up around the house.  Lately I'm either totally productive or the laziest person ever...I can't hit a happy medium.  I was talking to Sean for a minute while his lunch finished up at school when the other line beeped in so we quickly said goodbye. 

It was a social-worker from our adoption agency.  It's the first phone-call we have received so my heart jumped.  She was looking over our profile and wanted to double check on something.  In our marathon interrogation about the child and situation we were most comfortable with one of the few things we declined was adopting a child that was the product of a rape.  The social-worker currently is trying to place a little boy, 2 months old, who is half Caucasian, and half African American.  The birth mom is married, but was the victim of rape, and has decided now she and her husband can't keep the child.  She wanted to double check about showing them our profile.

It was heart-wrenching to say, "no"...even to just having our profile shown...with no guarantee of any interest in us.  It feels so judgmental, so altogether scary since this is our first chance for any communication about a child.  As I said to the social-worker, it just doesn't feel right in my heart.  And now, honestly, I feel like a horrid person for feeling that way.  I don't really know what else to say besides that. 

It really was a lightning quick taste of how hard this adoption could be.  How many emotions are tied into it that haven't even had the chance to reach the surface.  Sean said that's why we made all the decisions beforehand, since it's so emotional right in the moment.  (I called him crying when I got off the phone with the social-worker--he only had a minute since he had a classroom full of students waiting for him)

Please if you have a minute today, say a prayer or keep that little boy and his mother in your thoughts.  It wasn't meant to be for our family, but I'm praying that they will find a perfect placement for him.

A peek...

Just wanted to share a look at our bedroom and bathroom since they are FINALLY done...it's so neat to have a room with some personality...hopefully a good one. :)

Okay, okay...

If I were really honest, I'd admit I kind of have this thing about e-mail forwards...well it's just chain-like anything just doesn't work for me...whether it's recipes, warnings, luck...you catch my drift.  So when Lisa was nice enough to tag me with the latest blog go around I was sort of going to ignore it just a little bit...but then April tagged me too...so as opposed to casual avoidence and what is probably outright rudness, I will play along.   Way to take the fun out of a harmless blog game thing, huh?.  Yeah, I know, I suck.  Please don't get me wrong, though, I'm really grateful that my friends would want to include me. :) 

Now that that ramble is out of the way here we go...

4 jobs I've had…

1)  Drama Club Advisor at Redlands High School; Freshman Campus (the school was so big they had to move freshman to another school).  It was my freshman year at the UofR and I want to find a part time job at a school since I was going into teaching.  They were SO desperate to have a drama club and a play that they hired me even though I was just 18 years old.  The play was Up the Down Staircase…I still don't know how I ever managed to direct 40+ kids in a performance.  (but honestly I'd love to do it again)

2)  Camp Counselor at the YWCA

3)  Front Office secretary for a OBGYN (only job I've had not in education—hated it—but I did get free birth control pills—funny though, now we know we never needed them)

4)  High School RSP Instructional Aide

4 movies I could watch over and over

1)  Stepmom

2)  You've Got Mail

3)  Steel Magnolias

4)  When Harry Met Sally

4 places I have lived

1)  Evanston, IL

2)  Orange, CA

3)  Redlands, CA

4)  Santa Ana, CA

4 TV shows I love to watch

1)  Grey's Anatomy (SERIOUSLY addicted)

2)  West Wing

3)  Dancing with the Stars (Mac and I both are totally into it)

4)  Sex and the City re-runs

4 places I've been on vacation

1)  The Phillippines

2)  Vermont

3)  Chicago

4)  New York

4 websites I visit daily

1)  Two Peas in a Bucket

2)  a blog

3)  another blog

4)  yet another blog (sense a theme? :) )

4 of my favorite foods

1)  steak

2)  extra sourdough bread

3)  artichokes

4)  chocolate mousse

4 places I'd rather be right now

   1) Walking across a stage to get my Master's Degree in  Sociology/Woman's Studies

2) Traverse City, Michigan at a summer family reunion

3) New York City

4) In my completely finished, every detail makes me happy, bathroom (can you tell it's STILL not quite done?)

Habits...

I was able to make some new habits towards the end of 2005.  Exercise, being more vigilant about portions, cutting out some junk food and all fast food, exercise, cooking more, and a little more exercise. :)

I feel so much better than I did a few months ago, but I still have awhile to go to reach my ultimate weight loss goal.  Most importantly this is my LIFE now...it has to be  I can't forget that for a minute.  I have old habits I was able to break, but I have stay dedicated to keeping that way.

So, this year I want to add some more good habits.  One of the big ones in more fruits and vegetables...that whole five servings a day recommendation is my goal.  So, this week at the grocery store I stocked up...apples, grapefruit, bananas, zucchini, carrots, frozen spinach.  Here's a bunch of the fruit sitting in one my Crate & Barrel mixing bowls in the fridge since I ran our of room in the produce drawer and I also wanted to make it more of a visible reminder to eat them.  I'm really going to try to make my snacks fruit and then incorporate fruits and vegetables into as many meals as I can.

One of my very favorite foods is soup.  I've talked about my green soup pot before and I've REALLY loved trying to come up with new soup ideas in the last few months.  One of them is what I've named green soup (creative, huh?).  It's roughly based on a Martha Stewart Zucchini and Mint soup recipe.  I've unfortunately inherited my mother's ability to make recipes that have no true measurements...when I'd ask her to tell me a recipe over the phone for some tried and true recipe she'd make while I was growing up most often it'd be something she just threw together, she'd always be describing measurements in vague terms like you use, "a fair amount".  Basically that's what this recipe is, but I'm going to attempt to share it so bear with me...

Nora's Creatively Titled Green Soup :)

3 medium sized zucchini thinly sliced

approx 1/3 cup of chopped onion

4 decently sized garlic cloves chopped

salt

olive oil

butter

chicken broth…2 to 3 cups

parmesan cheese

gruyere cheese

cream cheese

approx 1/3 cup white wine or a Williams Sonoma white wine reduction that I LOVE

frozen spinach…1 box defrosted and well-drained

frozen peas

In a soup pot heat up a drizzle of olive oil (about two turns of the pan) and a pat of butter.  Add the onion and sauté for a couple minutes then add the garlic and continue sautéing for a few more minutes.  Add a little bit more olive oil and butter to the pot if it looks like it needs it since next you're going to dump in all your sliced zucchini.  Stir it around to coat it and then continue sautéing it over medium heat for approximately 7 minutes…until the zucchini begins to look a little translucent.  Add chicken broth, enough to cover the zucchini, bring it up to a boil and then return to a simmer until the zucchini is mushy…falls apart when you touch it with a fork…takes about 15 minutes. Now you're going to puree it…you can either use a hand blending stick or your blender…either way let the soup cool down a little.  Before you start pureeing, dump in about two tablespoons of cream cheese (whipped is the best), a good-sized palm full of grated parmesan cheese, the wine and a few small chunks of gruyere cheese…you can add whatever else sounds good to you…and you can take out whatever doesn't sound good to you…it's your recipe now.   :)  Add salt to taste.   Puree it until smooth then put it back into the pot on the stove and re-heat to a simmer.  Dump in the well-drained spinach and however many peas you want, just until it heats up.  There you have it…green soup…enjoy!

So, they say things happen in 3's...

right?  Last Spring Mac had dental surgery to fix the enormous amount of cavities he had.  Then this Fall we had the undescended testicle excitement.  Well, let me tell you about my day...

I realize this morning that Mac has a rescheduled appointment with his orthopedist for a general check.  He hadn't seen him in about a year so it was time.  for the last few years we had been seeing Dr. Rosenfeld four times a year at a Botox clinic at our local children's hospital.  A check every three months and he was getting an injection of botox in his leg about once a year.  Remember Mac detests needles so it would always be a fun trip...either totally tense on the way there and then skipping with joy on our way out when we didn't get an injection, or the bloody screaming terror when we did need one.  However last year Allergen (the company that produces botox) decided to pull it's support from the study since they certainly weren't making any money off of helping children with cerebral palsy...not that we were bitter or anything...well, Mac wasn't at least. :)

Back to today...picked Mac up from school, rushed to the office because we were running late.  All the while my dear child whimpering in the back seat.  I knew full well that there would be no botox today because now we will have to bill our insurance and would have to wait for approval...but, stealthy mom that I am, I didn't tell Mac that because I'd rather give him the, "I don't know...we'll just have to see" than "No, no, no you're not going to get it this time...BUT next time..." and then have to deal with that terror filled car ride in a few weeks.  So I dealt with the incessant tears and tried to brainstorm with him about a reward he could concentrate on if he didn't go freaking crazy.

We waited at the doctor's for almost an hour...Mac actually fell asleep for awhile as I read Creating Keepsakes.  Then when Dr. Rosenfeld finally walked in the door it was my turn to pee my pants.

Usual exam...walk in the hallway...run in the hallway...stretch this...measure that.  So, it's a good time for surgery.

What?

Um yeah, that would be surgery to start to repair his hand

and his leg.

At the same time.

Holy shit.

Once Mac figured out he wasn't having botox he certainly perked up...and his only question about surgery was, "They put me to sleep, right?".  Meanwhile I'm just slightly, completely overwhelmed...re-arranging tendons...short cast on his arm...walking cast on his leg...six weeks....over night hospital stay...back to school after the weekend...can't get it wet...a chance he might not need his brace at some point...no risks involved beyond anesthesia.

Thank good God for once that my father is an orthopedic surgeon so I could scribble down several surgical acronyms and call him when I got home.  He thinks it's a good idea...very traditional surgery in kids with CP...this is a good age to do it...very safe......and, as he said, "Well that'll give Sam a fun little surgery to do"...thanks Dad.  He also went on to offer to call "Sam" aka Dr. Rosenfeld and ask him some more questions and then explain it further to me...instead of him giving me questions to ask and me not understanding the answers...now we're talking...thanks Dad...and he said he'd be more than happy if Bryce wanted to call him if he had any questions...now he's the best father EVER. :)

Bryce and I talked about it...he's worried as am I, but can see the benefits, as can I.  Hopefully we can get the third surgery in less than a year done and then be good for awhile, hopefully?  Otherwise they're going to have to start giving me anesthesia...

A little tiny bit overwhelmed...

So here it is Thursday...one official day left of Sean's vacation.  The bathroom is no where near done...even though lots of stuff has been done and certainly tons of stuff has been bought.  Just a typical case of biting off more than can be chewed this week...maybe, just maybe, we can finish it off tomorrow.  I'm really excited to see it come together. This is the before photo as we were just getting started...we're at least further along than this!

I was on the phone with one of my friends last night and she mentioned that it just might be time to pull out the Ireland guidebooks and maybe start to plan our trip there being that it's a mere 35 days away and as of now arriving at the airport in Dublin is the extent of what we have planned.  I started flipping through the books and am completely overwhelmed by the fact that the entire country seems to be castles converted into hotels and charming bed and breakfasts...too many choices!  I've got to start getting things done...this trip is going to be as good as we make it, and that won't be too good if we don't anything about the country we're visiting.  On the slightly productive front we were able to find an awesome travel bag to use when we were at The Container Store looking for jars for our bathroom...so at least that's something.

And, on a completely unrelated note, I made dinner tonight and felt compelled to share the recipe for some reason...probably because it's so damn good I want to spread the word. :)

Bolognese Bread Pizza

1 long loaf, 20 to 24 inches, Italian semolina bread, day old is fine
1 tablespoon extra-virgin olive oil, 1 turn of the pan
2 slices pancetta or bacon, chopped
2 pounds ground beef
2 cloves garlic, chopped
2 medium yellow onions, peeled and finely chopped
1 small carrot, peeled and chopped
Coarse black pepper and coarse salt
1 tablespoon Worcestershire sauce
1 teaspoon allspice
1/2 cup red wine
1/2 cup beef stock
1 (14-ounce) can crushed tomatoes
Handful flat-leaf parsley, finely chopped
2 cups shredded mozzarella cheese
4 handfuls grated Parmigiano or Romano
1 cup fresh basil, 20 leaves, shredded or torn

Heat the oven to 450 degrees F.

Split bread lengthwise then cut in half again and hollow out some of the insides of bread. Lightly crisp bread in oven, 5 to 8 minutes. Remove bread and switch broiler on.

Heat a nonstick skillet over medium-high to high heat. Add extra-virgin olive oil, 1 turn of the pan. Add the pancetta, render a minute or so, add the meat and break it up into an even layer. Let the meat caramelize 1 to 2 minutes without stirring. Break it into small bits and brown well. Add garlic, onions and carrots and season with lots of coarse pepper, some salt, Worcestershire and allspice then cook 10 minutes, stirring frequently. Add wine and scrape up pan bits. Add stock and loosen up the mixture a little. Add tomatoes and parsley and heat through, 1 to 2 minutes. Fill breads and top with a thin layer of mozzarella and a sprinkle of Parmigiano or Romano. Broil the pizzas to melt cheese. Top each pizza liberally with basil and serve (with a fork and knife).

Okay, some "Nora Notations" on the recipe...

I used a hollowed loaf of french bread...didn't bother with the pancetta or bacon...only used one onion...added sugar because I like my tomato sauce to be sweet...added one chopped up green pepper and a pack of frozen spinach, defrosted and very well rung out...didn't use any allspice, parsley or basil...I put a little margarine and garlic salt on the bread before initially toasting it...layered the cheese and meat so it cheesy throughout

Hope you like it :)

 

Oh so cool...

...this green purse from J. Jill finally on sale

...that fact that Sean has started putting this paint on the walls in our bathroom and that this time I actually remembered to take before photos of a re-decorating project

...Trader Joes...wandered through there for just about forever yesterday...so much good food to check out...cheeses, nuts, salad dressings....brought home a whole bunch of stuff to try

...some of the scrapbooking I've been able to do in the last couple of days (not saying that my scrapbooking is oh so cool...rather that getting the chance to scrapbook has been oh so cool)

...this print that I ordered last night to go in our newly decorated bathroom

...the fact that my search for comfortable, black, mule mary jane shoes has seemingly come to an end with these...they very well might have a frumpy grandma-ish flair but I'm going to attempt to carry them off as old-fashioned funky :)

I've been in my pajamas all year...

How often can you say that? :)

We had a great New Year's celebration with friends...good food, Trivia Pursuit 90's edition (the girls beat the boys), champagne, and lots of laughter...we headed back home this morning and had a wonderfully lazy day around the house. 

Stayed in our pajamas...scrapbooked a little...had candles burning around the house...it was rainy outside...dogs were laying by the fireplace...had homemade split pea soup simmering on the stove and ate it with grilled cheese sandwiches for dinner...watched a movie (Fever Pitch-which was so cute!)...just hung out together.

So far 2006 couldn't be much better!