Way back on November 6, 2006, Sean and decided to stop the fertility treatments we were trying, to not try to adopt again, to dismantle the nursery we had and to give everything away.
That was the heartbreaking part.
But the hopeful part seemed like it was a pretty good plan. To be extra grateful we were Mac's parents. Sean wanted to start running and train for a marathon. He wanted to coach in the after school program at his junior high. And I wanted to finish my bachelor's degree and and finally be the teacher I had dreamed of being since I was twelve years old.
A year later Sean was running the Portland marathon and I was finishing the units I needed to transfer to the local state college.
Ten years later, Mac is working hard and enjoying college. Sean coaches three sports each school year and has been running over a hundred miles a month for years. And I am in my third year of teaching still pinching myself over the moments I get to spend with my students.
A few years ago I described our "infertility clause" like this, "Sean and I are big on counting our blessings so often when we are in a moment that we're really enjoying we'll point out to each other that this is what we get to have because of what we weren't able to have. Just trying to always keep the grass green on our side of the fence."
Ten years after we made our decision this could not be more true. We are a very lucky little family.